Thursday, 18 June 2015

Writing

Description: we have been writing a story about a robot and a scientist. 


Ones a opon time there was a big red robot. There was also a scientist called bobby. He went in a portal that leads to a robot town. That robot town had the big red robot and that scientist wanted the robot to come back to the house with him. Then the robot and bobby the scientist made the robot go in his garage. The scientist trains the robot to be a good robot to help people in the world. He was working on a poisoin that made the robot small. all night for two weeks i finally made it the cemicle x.so now I can throw this at the robot then he will be small for ever to help people. But one thing happens to the cemicle x the robot Bracked the cemicle x his arm got small but his hole body didn't become smaller. He had a small arm and a big body. That is so weird how did it happen to the robot. 


Big idea: my story is goodit will blow you mind.

Feedback: your story was awesome and it was very interesting
James
Feedforward:  fix your mistakes that you made


Evaluation: I think I can get my writing I bit slow on paper and write slow on my iPad because I will mess up.

1 comment:

  1. Your goal is not clear in your description Memphis, but I know that it was to add connectives and conjunctions to the beginning of your sentences. We do this to add variety to our story. This is something that will remain a goal.

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